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Futurologists often get things wrong and none more often than doomsayers of all persuasions. 1960s and ’70s feminism was particularly scary for those men whose common sense told them they’d never be able to cook or do housework and so faced a brutal descent into starvation and grave uncleanliness. Yet the opposite happened with today’s men better groomed than ever before.
Later developments in genetics, combined with women’s success in the workplace led the same kind of man to look into the mirror once again. This time, having failed to beat his woman back into the kitchen he exhibited a degree of humility. Listing his unique skills and abilities he exclaimed, in a moment of great epiphany, ‘Oh-mi-god, what does she need me for?’.
Yet once again such doomsayers may be at the wrong end of the stick. Via this place I’ve come across the latest developments in babe technology (don’t worry it’s safe to look), which includes the computer generated lady above. If the androgynous look’s not for you, don’t worry: your type of woman is just a few mouse clicks away.
The breakthrough is that she’s no longer just a pretty face as over here I found out about the particularly dirty minded Jenny18 (still safe to look, but you’re approaching the danger zone). Jenny is a chatbot with a vocabulary of 3,800 dumb blonde phrases and she talks dirty. Now that may be considerably less than the average woman, but hey, it’s all Jenny needs. She spends her life in internet chat rooms so her partners have no idea they’re talking to a robot. The idea is that if the nonces are talking to Jenny, they’re not corrupting our youth. If she’s having trouble locating a response, she tends to fall back on ‘i want to see u naked…spread on my bed ;)’.
Still doubtful? All this week on the Radio 1 breakfast show, Scott Mills has been making calls to businesses using clips of dialogue from films. His vocabulary’s only around half a dozen phrases, but that didn’t stop Al Pacino as Ricky Roma rowing with the owner of a Liverpool hair salon: ‘This is Ricky Roma’…‘do you want an appointment?’…‘this is Ricky Roma’…‘do I know you?’… ‘you just cost me $6,000!’…‘how have I cost you $6,000?’…‘Where did you learn your trade, you idiot? Who ever told you that you could work with men?’…‘I don’t know what you’re talking about’…‘you just cost me $6,000!’. In the end she makes him an appointment for that afternoon.
