Up until its appearance on Mary Queen of Shops, Chorlton menswear shop HT Burt was not a place anybody below retirement age would give a second glance, but I’ve just paid them a two visits in just a few weeks.

The draw is not the Hackett, though I do like Abercrombie & Fitch, but a good selection of very contemporary limited edition Van Buck ties. Sadly Van Buck’s website is a bit rubbish and fails to show the ties in all their glory, but I promise you will get comments.

And, given that tie wearing isn’t as fashionable as it used to be, a tie should be a talking point. There’s little point giving up the comfort of an open neck for the sake of something nobody notices. Ties almost certainly do convey a degree of seriousness, but they need not, as the FT’s Emma Jacobs argues, signal that the wearer is inherently conservative. Those without ties may be simplistic followers of fashion.

Anyway, back to HT Burt and Mary Portas, aka Mary Queen of Shops. It’s great TV, populist reality programming with a laudable business twist, but like most formats with a rigid programme template you eventually get the sense that you’re watching the same thing over and over.

It tends to turn out that the great guru has just one simple formula that she applies to all. In the case of Mary Portas, it’s use your connections to secure a deal with a trendy brand, here it was Hackett, and others will follow. But not only would it not have occurred to HT Burt to make an approach like that (hence the need for Mary), they would never have persuaded Hackett to supply them if Mary Portas hadn’t been involved.

So the wider lesson to the viewing public is that it’s not what, but who you know that counts… although you can always hire Mary yourself.

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Sorting through some recently forgotten photos, out pops an image of what may be the least desirable of concert memorabilia (spotted at The Police a few weeks ago): the ‘Not a Backstage Pass’.

The wearer announces to the world that they have no connections. They have not met Sting. Stuart Copeland is not their friend. Andy Summers doesn’t know they exist. They have not drunk cider with roadies.
Uploaded by mobile phone to Stephen Newton’s diary of sorts

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If you’re looking for a quality, dust free muesli then the Dorset Cereals range is for you. I tend to go for Really Nutty.

And right now they’re on promotion at Sainsbury’s: two boxes for £4.50 or one box for £2.09.

It must be a special initiative to discourage muesli bingeing.
Uploaded by mobile phone to Stephen Newton’s diary of sorts

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I’ve always struggled to understand the attraction of Australasia. Sure Australia has some nice beaches, but it seems a long way to go just for a bit of sun. Spain, France, Italy, Greece and Turkey, say, seem far more accessible and cultured. Most people seem to have far more to say about the places they visit for a stopover, like Dubai or Hong Kong, so why bother completing the journey?

Of the world’s developed nations, New Zealand must be the least attractive being miles away from anywhere, but with a climate much like Britain’s.

So it’s no surprise that bored parents have taken to giving their children bizarre names, like Sex Fruit, Number 16 Bus Shelter, Keenan Got Lucy, Midnight Chardonnay and, for twins, Benson and Hedges.

(Although I should own up to quite liking Violence Newton.)