‘But it turned out to be the same sort of scene, 1892 or 1982: bright and above all rich young men attracted to the frolics of the underclass whose natural energy and rawness was far beyond the aspirations of their upper-crust birth… In their traditional tailcoats, the boys would traipse across the playing-fields of Eton, interested not in plotting victory in the next battle of Waterloo, but scouting the ground for their next spliff.’
– Daily Telegraph on David Cameron: from Eton drugs to Oxford excess
Poor old David Cameron. Even the posh Tory paper uses his alleged drug taking as an opportunity to bash a toff. And there’s nothing wrong with that. It makes for a great spectator sport and eats away at his silly attempts to get down with the kids. The Tory Tosser campaign was never going to work and he should accept himself for who he is; an old school toff (even if he thinks that’s worse than being a tosser).
It is also funny to see the most militant Tory bloggers squirm. Poor old Dominic Fisher (aka Prague Tory and most famous for calling George Osborne a wanker over drugs policy) promises silence, but can’t resist this pompous twaddle: ‘What kind of message do his words send to kids? Ambiguous messages from people in authority about drugs are a big problem. All youngsters (and many adults) need protection against drugs from adult society.’
Dominic doesn’t seem to realise that he is one of only a very few Tory nerds who occasionally aspire to be like Dave and so this is not an issue. (To give you an idea Mr Fisher was once a ‘few chaps’ form captain; ‘I got a few other detentions… one I got for putting a drawing pin on someone’s seat’.) Even in the Telegraph his kind is a joke. If you aspire to be like David Cameron, the occasional spliff is the least of your social problems.
And yet I can’t help thinking that Cameron’s missing a trick. His insistence that his past is private will get him nowhere and just paints him as evasive. If he had something about him, he’d own up to the odd joint and use that confession as evidence that, despite what everyone thinks of him, he’s had the odd human experience. And what’s more he learned from it and those learnings inform a radical new Tory drugs policy that might actually make a difference. Cameron gave up the pot and so can you! (Are you thinking what I’m thinking?)