I’ve not mentioned this before, but Critter – seen here paying homage to Klimt – has not been well lately. Go see Shrek 2 and watch out for the Puss in Boots hairball sequence. That’s how Critter’s been for almost three weeks (not hair though) following a disagreement with some antibiotics.
Anyway. He’s well insured and so enjoys healthcare on demand at one of the country’s leading veterinary hospitals (a far cry from his hobo days). His insurers, MORE TH>N, paid out pretty promptly but what’s awoken the curmudgeon in me is the tone of the covering letter. ‘Do write and let me know how everything went,’ writes Stephanie Simmonds, ‘and tell us how you’re both getting on.’ Given that Stephanie’s (understandably?) too busy to sign the letter by hand, I have to doubt MORE TH>N’s sincerity. I don’t imagine for a moment that anyone at the oddly named Ceefa Deefa House felt tearful at the idea of Critter being unable to keep his food down. And I bet I wouldn’t get a similar letter if my CDs got nicked – ‘Do let us know how you’re getting on re-building the collection’ – because they only write letters like that to people with pets, as if keeping an animal softens the brain.
Somewhere there’s a little old lady penning a couple of thousand words on the life and times of Benjie the poodle under the mistaken impression that somebody cares.