OAP of Newton Heath writes in the Manchester Evening News of the horrors of New Year. Having gone to bed at 10pm the poor soul awoke at midnight in the mistaken belief that World War Three had broken out. The neighbours were having a party to which OAP had not been invited.
Anyway. OAP asks if this is what they can look forward to from now on. Recent statistics suggest not as Newton Heath’s not a very nice place to live. Life expectancy is a well below average (just 72 for men) and given that OAP remembers ‘the Blitz 65 years ago’, chances are they’re on borrowed time already. So the neighbours will soon be able to party with a clear conscious.